Don't Get Caught

“Do something good today and don’t get caught.”

That’s the advice Kristen Bell got from her therapist and then shared on the The Good Place podcast.

Jesus is very clear that the intentions by what we do are just as important as the actions themselves. If you do good just to earn points or for the attention and praise, then it’s not really all that good.

Pray in secret. (Matthew 6:5-6)

Don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. (Matthew 6:3)

How many secret good deeds can you pull off tomorrow?

The Good Place is a wonderful show. Season 3 is about to start next week. The first 2 seasons are on Netflix. I can’t recommend it enough. The podcast is also a fun listen after you watch the episodes.

You Can't Buy Your Way Out of Anxiety

I just read Rebecca Jennings’ article on VOX, Fidget Spinners, Weighted Blankets, and the Rise of Anxiety Consumerism.

There a lot of popular products out now that want to be the answer to your anxiety.

But they can’t.

FDA guidelines strongly recommends these companies never claim their products can be used to treat anxiety because there’s not really any scientific proof that they do. Instead they get away with just saying their products “can be used for anxiety.”

They might help relieve some of the stress and frustration but they’re not cures. The effect is addressed but never the cause.

And these products are HUGE. Most of them started on Kickstarter and raised millions of dollars because people are desperate for something to help them with anxiety.

From the article:

“We’re not understanding how to deal with [mental health]. Instead, we’re throwing products at it. It’s very American.”

We’re dealing with the fruit and not the tree (I was going to say root but I didn’t want to rhyme). We’re pulling all the apples off the apple tree and hoping oranges start growing.

Why do we do this? Because it’s easier. Because to really change things we need to attack the roots and commit the hard work of removing the entire tree and planting a new one. It’s scary, it’s difficult, and it’s incredibly uncomfortable.

It could involve going to a counselor or digging in to your past or being truly honest about how you view yourself.

It could be a really painful process. But it’s worth it.

From the article:

“It makes sense that our immediate impulse is to buy stuff that promises to deal with [our anxiety] so that we don’t have to.”

It’s hard work. In Recovering Redemption they called it “spiritual surgery.” But it’s the type of surgery where you’re awake the whole time.

Oh man, how great would that be, though? God knocks you out, you wake up a few hours later, and He says “Ok. I took your anger issues away.” Sweet.

I can’t buy my way to freedom. I have to be willing to do the work.

Oh Jesus please remind my heart daily that the work is worth it and that you’re the one guiding me through every step.

What Dracula Taught Me About Journaling

Growing up I thought keeping a diary was just for girls and journaling was just for Doug. And almost every tv show I watched as a kid had an episode where someone finds the main character’s diary and reads their darkest secrets. Why would I ever want to journal?! Someone could find it and read it!

But that’s actually the best part of having a journal.

I’ve been reading Bram Stoker’s Dracula because I’m in the mood for something spooky. Last night I read a passage where a woman is writing in her diary and she describes why she enjoys the process so much. She writes:

“I am anxious, and it soothes me to express myself here; it is like whispering to one’s self and listening at the same time.”

Journaling is so great because it’s a chance for you to eavesdrop on a conversation with yourself.

You’re giving yourself the time and space to vomit up all your thoughts and feelings about what’s been going on, examine it all, and organize your thoughts. Are you ever at a loss because you’re not really sure how you feel about something going on in your life? It’s like you’re in a fog and everything is ambiguous and weird? Any time I get that way I try to write it all out.

Process it on paper. Wrap words around those vague feelings hiding out in the back of your mind. Get it out of your system and make sure you pay attention to what’s coming out. It might surprise you. Eavesdrop on yourself.

Thanks for the lesson, Dracula.

WANT MORE?

I found this really in great article highlighting nearly a dozen reasons Why Keeping a Daily Journal Could Change Your Life

Be the Help

Whenever a public figure takes their own life, we get on social media hoping to reach out to those who are also struggling. We encourage them to seek help.

What if we’re speaking to the wrong people?

Rick Warren, in his first sermon series back after his son took his own life, told his church the one thing you should never say to someone dealing with a tragedy:

“Don’t say to somebody who just went through a major loss—they just got fired, they just got a bad report from the doctor. Don’t say ‘call me if you need anything.’ That’s about the dumbest thing you can say to somebody in shock. Because now you’ve put it on them. They’ve got to work to get your help. You’re not taking the initiative. You’re forcing them to take the initiative.”

Are we doing the same with those struggling with their mental health?

Are we saying “seek help” when we should be saying to those in the church “BE THE HELP.” Are our small group leaders and volunteers the ones we need to speak life in to when depression and anxiety is the national conversation so they feel empowered to ask the difficult questions of those under their care?

Be the help.

Don’t wait for them to reach out to us. Go to them.

After struggling with depression and anxiety, Andrew Stoecklein, lead pastor of Inland Hills Church in California, took his own life this last weekend.

Instead of saying: 
“Pastors, there are people in your life who love you and care for you. It’s ok to talk to them if you’ve had similar thoughts…”

I want to say: 
“Pastors, if you have people in your life who you love and care for, reach out to them to this week. Ask how they’re doing and then ask them again to make sure you got the honest answer."

Be the help. Take the initiative.

This week I'm praying for Andrew's family, his church, and for the conversations we need to have with the people we love.

Cleaning a van sucks

I spent most of tonight cleaning my car. Camp season is about to start. It'll be chaotic and exciting and if I'm not careful my car will become a horrifying mess that'll just get worse and worse all summer.

When I lived in my van I had a real hard time keeping it clean. I would let it get super dirty until I hit rock bottom and then I'd be like "ok this has gone too far" and I'd clean. That's also my process with haircuts.

Luckily my new car doesn't have as much space as my Honda Odyssey so cleaning doesn't take ALL DAY. Here's an old video of me cleaning out my van before my house show tour. Watching it brought back a lot of wonderful memories. I used to live in my van. How weird is that?

Talking Mental Health at Church

Last week I saw a church sign that was so good it convinced me to visit their Sunday morning service. That has NEVER happened to me before.

Church signs never interest me. I’ve never seen a joke on a church sign and thought “I GOTTA BE A PART OF THAT!” I’m sure it could happen as long as the joke was incredible. Like, it would have to be the greatest joke I’ve ever seen in my life. One of those “crash your car because you’re laughing so hard” good.

This sign didn’t have joke.

“TALKING MENTAL HEALTH” is what caught my eye. Yes. Yes. Yes. How awesome is that? I even pulled into the church parking lot so I could take a picture and post it on social media with the caption “more churches need to do this!”

The service the next day was really good too. Pastor Bobby Contreras was super open and honest and had a lot of great things to say.

“If we don’t have this conversation in church, where we to have it.”

Yes and amen.

It’s like when parents are nervous having the sex talk with their kids but they convince themselves it’s the right thing to do because who knows what those little perverts at school are telling them. If they don’t get to have that conversation with you, they’ll look for someone else to have it with. And those other people could be spreading toxic garbage.

The church needs to address the uncomfortable topics EVEN IF NO ONE IN THE CHURCH IS CURRENTLY DEALING WITH IT. 

1. (ONE) They might not be dealing with it now but who knows what tomorrow will hold.

2. (TWO) Someone could be dealing with mental health issues without realizing that’s what it is. It might take someone else talking about it for them to realize “oh shoot that sounds like what I’ve been going through.”

3. (THREE) Everyone who isn’t struggling with their mental health is still going out into the world and interacting with people who are. They can learn from the church how to talk about the issue and how to love someone going through it.

A newsletter is better than social media

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Social media is the worst way to stay connected with people. Algorithms screw up your time line and show you 5 week old posts from complete strangers before you get to see anything from people you actually wanted to follow.

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Don't rely on social media. You might not ever hear from me again. What if I get beat up by wild geese and there's a hilarious video of the attack but it gets lost in your timeline and you never see it?! Why take that risk?! You might miss out completely on the new podcast I'm working on. You could miss out on new videos, free stuff, weird projects, and more. What if I meet a ghost?

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Sending out letters

Over the last month I've really started taking pride in the rewards I'm making for my Patreon supporters. At first they were all just afterthoughts, everything was quickly tossed together. They were obligations.

In all honestly, all I really cared about was getting new people signed up. Once they committed to supporting me, I felt like I could ignore them, moving on to someone else who hadn't yet gotten on board.

This mindset sucked.

At $15 a month you get a Patreon exclusive podcast. I've started having a LOT more fun putting those episodes together, making it as entertaining as possible.

The monthly livestream is now a fun creative challenge. How do I keep this interesting every month?!

And today I mailed my handwritten letters. I love the idea of passing along the sweet thank you notes I get every once in a while. Like I say in the video, when they're thanking me, they're also thanking all my Patreon supporters.

Visit my Patreon page.

This is unrelated but I have to mention it. It was not until I looked at the thumbnail for this video JUST NOW that I realized how horrifically crooked all the picture frames are in my parents' office. That looks bonkers.

Starting a Patreon was a LEAP OF FAITH but I'm so glad I took it.

Summer's the Worst

It's getting hotter and hotter in Texas. Summer is here and I hate it.

I hate getting in to a hot car. I hate back sweat. I hate having to oil myself up with glob after glob of sunscreen.

When I went outside today all I could think was "summer's the worst." Immediately the Michael Leviton song with that name got stuck in my head and it hasn't left.

This was one of those sad songs for sad boys that I put on a lot of mix C.D.'s my freshman year of college.

When I looked up the video for this post I saw that this music video is 11 years old. I am old now. I'm an old grumpy man who much prefers the fall and winter.

The only good thing about summer is youth camp.

The Genie is Free

My friend Seth has been singing the Genie song from Aladdin every week for an entire year. Why? Because it's dumb and funny and no one commits to a goof better than him.

He just posted his 52nd video. It's been a full year. He did it. He stuck with it. I am in awe.

For his final performance he went full genie.

Congratulations, Seth. You are free.

If you missed it, you should also watch Seth sing Katy Perry's Firework.